Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Away Message: Out to Life

I stopped posting here last year when I realized, after some honest introspection, that it was definitely dragging me down. I wanted to reach out to you and others who might have been in the same place I was. And as much as I loved talking to so many of you, I'm afraid I still need to limit the amount of doses of this poison that I encounter. While I've successfully avoided relapse, I can still smell my face in the toilet when I read these blogs, and I don't want my mind to dwell there ever again. It was another life ago, and I'm at peace now.

Since last year it looks like a lot of you have stopped posting. I may pop back from time to time, but for now I'll be leaving the parting message from my first post as my "away message."

I hope someone can find strength, courage and possibly even healing in my words, which is why I'm leaving this blog up.

If you'd like to contact me, please feel free to comment below and then e-mail me privately at TheKateofSpades@gmail.com. (But you'll need to leave a comment for me to go check the e-mail.) I will regularly receive and respond to any genuine comments or questions. But like I said, I'll otherwise not be lurking around the pro-ana community. You may find me without realizing it, blogging about my new life somewhere else.

I wish you peace.

Kat

14 comments:

  1. hey !!

    i recall the amount of posters last year and i too was surprised that many have stopped posting.. i hope they have found comfort and i expect many to either be in recovery or have to have ' packed ' the whole thing in .

    i agree that these blogs do feed you and the longer your here the more difficult it is to break fee.

    i drifted for a while but again now my life is somewhat turmoil i have come back to the only thing i know ..

    xx

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  2. Aww :( ... I loved this blog! Good to know your recovering though, your not the only one. I feel the same way about these blogs, they can trigger you.

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  3. This seems like closure for all of us, for you and every person that followed your blog. It has been a while since you posted, but I still remember how great of a writer you were, and how your blog truly touched my heart. Your blog got me through some of my darkest days, and I'm extremely glad it was there.

    I'm glad you have recovered and finally found peace, I am striving to do the same.

    Thank you Kat, for everything you've given me, even if you don't realise it.

    I wish you a lifetime of healthiness and happiness.

    Lots and lots of love <3

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  4. Hi,

    Reading this post was extremely encouraging. I'm Kerri Pang, a journalism student at Northwestern University and am working on an enterprise story about the prevalence of eating disorders among young women. I sent you an e-mail, and hopefully I'll hear back from you soon. Press on!

    - kerri

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  5. We will miss you, but i believe you're making the right decision. If you feel that recovery is the right road for you to travel down, don't ever turn from it or go near any place or any person that will make you tempted to turn from it. Love and best wishes to you from me.

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  6. respect that you are on recovery...kiss


    http://mizzloca88.blogspot.com/

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  7. Hi, i don't know if you'll read this, but i just wanted to tell you that having entered recovery for a few months, having become increasibngly dissatisfied with my weight increase, i came back onto blogger to purposefully encourage myself back into ed. Hopwever, instead i found this blog. and it reminded me exactly why i left, and how much happier i am having got rid of my scales, stopoped weighing myself every day, judging myself purely on whether my weight had gone up or down half a pound, hating myself more and more, for my inability to acheive unrealistic weightloss, isolating myself from friends and family, and hating myself, always feeling like a failiure. yes, i may weigh a bit more, and it really can be a struggle, but life is so much better. so thankyou.

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  8. I'm very glad to hear that - keep fighting. :)

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  9. Hi Kate, this is Della
    Please email me at emeraldbreakdown0@gmail.com

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  10. Della -
    I tried e-mailing you but the e-mail address failed. Where are you?

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  11. My best friend is ana. It breks my heart. But being near her, and her skinny body tempts me to become ana.

    I know it's not the right choice, so I steer clear.

    As for youu Kate, I'm so glad your recovering! (: <3

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  12. Once more, c'est Della.

    emmymagic@gmail.com

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  13. Goodbye, Ana.
    For as long as you're here, we're not.

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  14. glad this shitshow came to an end. Good luck to you and "Kat" and your family.

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